Vignettes

Serendipity

Serendipity is one of my favorite words in the English language. So is kismet and bliss. I imagine kismet and bliss bubbling away in the cauldron of my belly. All that barely repressed longing escaping through my eyes–belying a slow, delicious burn from the inside.

I heard a name I hadn’t heard spoken of for a while now. Saw 1111, 222, 555, and 1221 within the space of a few hours. Heard my name whispered like a tinkling of Tibetan bells, sweet and light in the wind–a lover’s plea. Why does something like this happen when I least expect it, when all I want is to be free?

Somebody up there must be laughing with all the energetic push and pull going on, the constant turning of Fortune’s Wheel when I haven’t even lifted a finger, moments when I doubt everything. I don’t know why the Universe is stubborn and persistent nor why I am still getting signs. And whatever happens, whatever I do or not do, serendipity always finds a funny way of pulling me back to the center. But one thing I know for sure: I released my desires to the Universe many moons ago, and I am living in my truth. There were low moments when I struggled to get back up, but there was also sweet relief at finding peace and acceptance on the other side–a sense of victory that I pulled myself through. I needed to change the lens through which I see the world–one that’s full of hope and possibilities. It feels like waking up to gaze at the early morning sunlight drenching our garden with a rosy glow. I can make of it whatever I want. I’ll find and take joy wherever and whenever I can–joy in solitude and shared joy with those I choose to spend my time with. And I won’t hold on with clenched fists. Like floating effortlessly in calm waters or gliding on ice, I’ll let serendipity flow through me and carry my weight.

*Inspired by the movie Serendipity (2001) and the song Northern Sky by Nick Drake (1970)

#2222 #222

Northern lights + Nick Drake
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