Journey to the center of You 🌹

What am I grateful for in my soul journey?


Just a few days (and weeks) ago, I could not answer this question. I was immersed in my personal battles and wounds. It was a scary place I found myself in because I lost interest even in the little things that brought me joy like baking and following my creativity. I felt no pleasure in cooking and eating–it was reduced to a chore, a robotic function. I was also a walking storm raring for destruction because I was hurting inside and could not let it go. There was a lot I needed to declutter both physically and metaphorically.

Recently, I started opening my heart again to the truth that I am always being reminded through connections with other kindred spirits, through an outpouring of signs and messages from the Divine, through the love I receive every day, that I chose my soul journey and I am choosing to stay. Even through the difficult times when I am tempted to give up and unravel the work I’ve already done, when I don’t know what to do next, I choose to be here now no matter what now is. I commit to myself–my pain and healing, shadows and light, grief and joy, lessons and blessings. All these essential and complementing ingredients mix together and bake into a delectable Lea cookie. Or cake. Lol. 😂😂

I choose to show up bold and vibrant, with a sassy spirit and a full heart as much as I can. I am grateful for the turning-point moments when I see the light in the darkness and I find the strength to grasp on to it, to amplify and reflect it. I am also reminded of what the fierce spirit/artist & musician Nightbirde (Jane Marczewski), said on her memorable AGT audition: “You can’t wait until life isn’t hard anymore before you decide to be happy.” Simple but true. That’s what a soul and life journey is all about–you embrace everything you have gone and are going through, even the most challenging, heartbreaking ones–and do your best to make something good out of it every day. 🌻

P.S. While it’s a huge help having a trusted person around who supports and loves you unconditionally, I discovered that the best boost for soul growth is YOU. Learning to be a nurturing mother, cheerleader, and best friend to yourself especially when you didn’t have those kinds of loving relationships growing up opens many doors to healing and growth. You’ll find more love and grounding support than you ever did before because it flows from within. 💗

Image credit: iCreateDaily.com

Bloom and Grow

Growth and transformation cannot come from old narratives you recycle and resurrect again and again. When you pick off dead leaves from your plants, you throw them away or let them become a part of your compost. That’s a natural end to their purposeful life. You don’t change your mind and return dead leaves to your plants–dead leaves have no purpose anymore and carry the risk of infecting your healthy plants with disease or leaching nutrients off of them.

Let the old and what was rest peacefully in the past. From a new perspective comes new growth and possibilities–new doors that open to you and new paths that suddenly become available to you that aren’t possible when you stay stuck in the past.

Don’t allow dead leaves to spoil your roots and dampen your growth. You still have life left in you to bloom and grow into gifts and blessings. You contain seeds of light you can plant whenever and wherever you choose. 🌻

Affirmation: “I’ve let ____ go. Now I am in the flow.”

Love in the Multiverse

There are doors you need to close and they remain closed. Some you never even thought you’d get back to, but re-open only in Divine time. And then there is that rare door that remains open always. Love is an open door. Not the kind of love that limits you to one person or this world. It’s a love that embraces everything–always growing, ever evolving regardless of who you meet and connect with. It’s a love that has known but is never tainted by fear, regret, pain, shame. Like taking a page from Doctor Strange’s book, it is the kind of love that transcends time, space, and the multiverse. When everything else has fallen, love remains.

P.S. Thank you for reminding me of this, D, my wildflower soul sister. Love is infinite. 💗

Life is a choose-your-own-adventure book

“I contain multitudes.” — Zooey L’Enfant in Surreal Estate (2022)

Sometimes I forget to not get stuck in a narrative–a single story in the past which I continue to heal. Who I am, who I am becoming, what I still have to offer to the world–these are stories-in-the-making, tales in constant flow. These are the best kind of stories–like the choose-your-own-adventure books I used to check out from my school library–the unpredictable ones.

I contain multitudes–layers of stories that were already written, chapters done and pages yet to be filled. I am reminded that I am a speck amidst the vast landscape of the Universe just like all of us–made of stars dancing along the same wire that connects everyone and everything since the beginning. Within me flows the wisdom of the ages and a soul that is one with the divine. Anything is possible. After all, I am the Universe too.

I STAND WITH UKRAINE

I’m tempted to just write that Vladimir Putin is the world’s most delusional and deranged prick (the deadly kind) and leave it at that. But it’s not enough. I do not want to be witness to a potential world war in my lifetime. There are some who say that Russia invading Ukraine doesn’t affect us here in the Philippines, but we need to change the mindset that what happens to one nation doesn’t affect another in the world. Even looking at it through both realist and liberalist theory lenses, we cannot deny that we are all interconnected–consequences will reach us like ripple effects of a tsunami. How will it affect us? Any major geopolitical conflict leads to spikes in oil prices in the world market. We aren’t a major player so we follow global market prices. An increase in oil prices is followed by an increase in the prices of basic goods and services. Low-income consumers especially from third world countries like the Philippines will feel the effects the hardest. That’s just one of the more immediate effects. Chaos also breeds opportunists. It’s a given that China and North Korea (both nations notorious for being backed by Russia as well) have their own agendas for expansion–it’s not impossible for China and North Korea to enact any ideas to make an aggressive move on their targeted Asian neighbors. Taiwan is an obvious first target of China given its history of China not acknowledging its independence. But taking into account China’s outright rejection of honoring the arbitral ruling favoring the Philippines in the West Philippine Sea dispute, our country is in a vulnerable position too. As of writing this, China is currently conducting military exercises near Taiwan. Tensions are mounting, and amidst the world’s focus on the conflict in Ukraine, China’s moves are also being monitored closely by the West.

What Putin is doing to Ukraine is not the product of overnight planning. This was years in the making. Back in 2014, when Kremlin pulled off the illegal annexation of Crimea, a shadow was already cast. And suddenly, it wasn’t a matter of “if Russia plans to take Ukraine”, but “when”. It was one of the precursors that led to the invasion and blatant violation of Ukraine’s territorial sovereignty. Ukraine is a free, independent state separate from Russia, but Putin uses force in claiming Ukraine as always having been a part of Russia and justifying the means of the invasion with dangerous lies of cleansing Ukraine of Nazism and NATO influence and by default, saving the Russian people from these “threats”. He’s clearly nuts, but this kind of mindset is dangerous than it is entertaining. Prosecuting Putin and top Russian officials in the ICC (International Criminal Court) may be tricky because of technicalities, but that does not discount what they did as a clear act of aggression and violation of Article 2.4 of the U.N. Charter prohibiting the “use of force against the territorial integrity or political independence of any state”. Countries taking a stand and imposing hard sanctions on Russia, condemning Putin’s actions, and providing arms and financial aid to Ukraine may just be the advantage the Ukrainian government and people need at this time. Our solidarity with Ukraine and against acts of violence and aggression against another nation and its people can tip the scales in favor of justice. We need to be vigilant, firm, and united.

If there’s anything the current world situation has taught me is that we can never go back to what we perceived as normal–the way things were–and on a grander scale, we can’t go back to the old world order. They don’t and would not work at present anymore if we want to move forward, improve our lives, and enact changes for the greater good.

I am reminded of the evergreen Spiderman wisdom, “With great power comes great responsibility.” It is us–the people, who have the power and it is time we reclaim it. We cannot afford to be bystanders and on the fence anymore. Human lives are the cost of inaction, indecision, turning a blind eye on what’s happening. We need to make a stand. Making a stand means we do not condone this injustice happening to another and to us as well.

Make a stand for giving a voice to and upholding freedom, equality, individuality and interconnectedness, sovereignty, human rights. Not just for the people of Ukraine, but starting most of all, in our home turf.